plz talk dirty to me
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Randomize
