they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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