As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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