He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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