Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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