Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
