she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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