Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
