David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
