I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?