You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
