absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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