Already got asked if we're dating
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Randomize
