Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
