I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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