No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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