Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Damn victory sex feels great
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
