I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
