I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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