I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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