pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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