It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
