I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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