Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
