sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Randomize
