it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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