Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize