so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
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I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
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I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people