Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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