it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
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