I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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