Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Randomize
