I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
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