just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
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