so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
