Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
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