Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
