New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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