dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Is Oprah even human
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
