Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Even the bartender felt bad for me
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Randomize