it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
