did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Your tits are I can't wait for
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
