Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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