I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
