Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
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