So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Still dying that you shit outside
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
