Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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