I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
