Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
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