thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
